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12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times

Updated: Dec 3, 2024

shed and grow hypnotherapy and psychotherapy, logo, business logo, rebirth, therapist, hypnotherapist, psychotherapist, psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, central coast, long jetty, rebecca young, rebecca jayne young, naturalistic hypnosis, cbt, nlp, talk based therapy, counselling, growth mindset, coach, motivation, change behaviour, psychology, psychology student
Portrait photograph of Rebecca Young - Psychotherapist (Owner and operator of Shed & Grow).

Author: Rebecca J Young

Psychotherapist & Counsellor.

CERT. Psychology. BA PsychologIical Science (Student -- 2022-CURRENT). ADV DIP Clinical Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy, CBT & NLP. DIP Clinical Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy, CBT & NLP. ACA & PACFA (Acc). DIP Children's Services. Visual Artist, Box Enthusiast, Beach Lover, Book & Craft Nerd, & Mother of 2 Humans & 1 Collie.


Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times.

reframe. cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 12 parenting reframes for trying times
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: "12 Parenting reframes and reminders for trying times".

reframe. cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 1. Parent: “They are doing this intentionally to hurt me.” Your child's behaviour and emotional welfare reflect their dysregulated nervous system. It is not a personal attack on you. If your child is dysregulated, it is usually because they have an unmet need. Children's first point of call for regulation is typically to co-regulate with their parent, caregiver, or a secure attachment (if they have one).
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 1. Parent: “They are doing this intentionally to hurt me.” Your child's behaviour and emotional welfare reflect their dysregulated nervous system. It is not a personal attack on you. If your child is dysregulated, it is usually because they have an unmet need. Children's first point of call for regulation is typically to co-regulate with their parent, caregiver, or a secure attachment (if they have one).

reframe. cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 2. Parent: “Why can't they make my life easier?” It is your job as a parent to make your child's life easier, not the other way around.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 2. Parent: “Why can't they make my life easier? ” It is your job as a parent to make your child's life easier, not the other way around. 3. Parent: “Do as I say.” Children learn appropriate behaviour when we model appropriate behaviour. Behaviour is learnt through experience rather than words that do not match our actions.

Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 4. Parent: “Because I said so.” This authoritarian parenting tactic instils fear. Children begin to do what an authority figure tells them to do out of fear of punishment, despite their internal alarm bell telling them they feel unsafe. When children are forced to be blindly obedient to authority figures out of fear, it can result in them being more vulnerable regarding unsafe people or perpetrators. Instead of instilling obedience guide your children to identify a range of feelings and emotions within themselves and give them opportunities to put words to their experiences and feelings. Ensure you guide them to identify feelings of safety and unsafe feelings and safe and unsafe behaviours; this empowers children to listen to their bodies and notice red flags in their environment and relationships. From a safety and child protection standpoint, it is a positive sign when a child questions what they are being told or asked to do. Ensure your children know their rights and boundaries and know that all people sometimes make mistakes and do the wrong thing, including adults and authority figures.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 4. Parent: “Because I said so.” This authoritarian parenting tactic instils fear. Children begin to do what an authority figure tells them to do out of fear of punishment, despite their internal alarm bell telling them they feel unsafe. When children are forced to be blindly obedient to authority figures out of fear, it can result in them being more vulnerable regarding unsafe people or perpetrators. Instead of instilling obedience guide your children to identify a range of feelings and emotions within themselves and give them opportunities to put words to their experiences and feelings. Ensure you guide them to identify feelings of safety and unsafe feelings and safe and unsafe behaviours; this empowers children to listen to their bodies and notice red flags in their environment and relationships. From a safety and child protection standpoint, it is a positive sign when a child questions what they are being told or asked to do. Ensure your children know their rights and boundaries and know that all people sometimes make mistakes and do the wrong thing, including adults and authority figures.

Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads:5. Parent: “Don't say no to me.” If we want our children to learn about consent, they will tell us no occasionally. Do you ever say no to your child? So, what made you think they would never say no to you? If your child feels safe enough to challenge you and say no to you, this is a good sign that in an unsafe situation, they will notice red flags in their environment. If they feel safe enough to challenge you, this is an indication that they will listen to their internal alarm bell in an unsafe situation instead of listening to a potential perpetrator.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 5. Parent: “Don't say no to me.” If we want our children to learn about consent, they will tell us no occasionally. Do you ever say no to your child? So, what made you think they would never say no to you? If your child feels safe enough to challenge you and say no to you, this is a good sign that in an unsafe situation, they will notice red flags in their environment. If they feel safe enough to challenge you, this is an indication that they will listen to their internal alarm bell in an unsafe situation instead of listening to a potential perpetrator.


Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 6. Parent: “Don't talk back.” Comments like this silence our children and instil that they shouldn't have independent thought. We must allow our children space and safety in sharing their thoughts, feelings, beliefs and opinions -- especially when they differ from ours. We can do this by enquiring and sharing regarding where we got our information from rather than sharing as universals, ultimatums, or truths. For example, the doctors say... I believe... The Buddhists believe... What do you think about?... Current scientific literature suggests... Remember, our experiences are subjective and paradoxical; two realities and beliefs can exist simultaneously. Often it is not about having all the answers or teaching our children how to be right. It is about instilling how to ask the best questions, learning how to be curious, seek information, discover, investigate and how to enquire.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 6. Parent: “Don't talk back.” Comments like this silence our children and instil that they shouldn't have independent thought. We must allow our children space and safety in sharing their thoughts, feelings, beliefs and opinions -- especially when they differ from ours. We can do this by enquiring and sharing regarding where we got our information from rather than sharing as universals, ultimatums, or truths. For example, the doctors say... I believe... The Buddhists believe... What do you think about?... Current scientific literature suggests... Remember, our experiences are subjective and paradoxical; two realities and beliefs can exist simultaneously. Often it is not about having all the answers or teaching our children how to be right. It is about instilling how to ask the best questions, learning how to be curious, seek information, discover, investigate and how to enquire.

Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads:7. Parent: “After all I've done for you.” A parent-child relationship is not an equal one. It is one-sided. We change our infants' nappies and feed them milk. We don't expect them to say thank you afterwards. We provide our children with essentials for them to thrive and survive. What we give are all basic needs. We brought our children into the world; our role and responsibility as parents is to provide fundamental necessities for our children without expecting anything in return. 8. Parent: “That's nothing to cry about”, “That's not a big deal; suck it up”, “Let it go”, “Move on”, “Get over it.” It may not be a big deal to you, but I'm sure it is the whole world to them. Validate that their experiences matter. Allow them to feel through it rather than distract away from it. Validating emotions instils resilience. Invalidating emotions causes children to bury and internalise pain; this can feel unsafe and cause trauma, hypervigilance, and dissociation. It instils a sense of "there is something wrong with me" and "I am-not-good-enough-ness"
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 7. Parent: “After all I've done for you.” A parent-child relationship is not an equal one. It is one-sided. We change our infants' nappies and feed them milk. We don't expect them to say thank you afterwards. We provide our children with essentials for them to thrive and survive. What we give are all basic needs. We brought our children into the world; our role and responsibility as parents is to provide fundamental necessities for our children without expecting anything in return. 8. Parent: “That's nothing to cry about”, “That's not a big deal; suck it up”, “Let it go”, “Move on”, “Get over it.” It may not be a big deal to you, but I'm sure it is the whole world to them. Validate that their experiences matter. Allow them to feel through it rather than distract away from it. Validating emotions instils resilience. Invalidating emotions causes children to bury and internalise pain; this can feel unsafe and cause trauma, hypervigilance, and dissociation. It instils a sense of "there is something wrong with me" and "I am-not-good-enough-ness"

Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 10. Parent: “Learn some respect”, “Respect your elders.” Respect goes both ways and is not determined by age. If we want our children to be respectful, we must be respectful towards them. Children learn respect when parents model respect for others, including their children. 10. Parent: “I thought you were a big girl/boy”, “Stop acting like a baby”. When we link behaviour to maturity or age it instils shame in our children. Our children might be capable of a task but sometimes they might regress as a way of seeking our affection and love. Children can sometimes fear if they are more grown up, we might not love them as much or the same way. It is important as parents that we instill that our children are always worthy of love -- no matter their behaviour, age, stage of development and feelings. It is also important to remember that sometimes we all have difficult days or moments and tasks that are usually simple sometimes require more focus than usual, or they may even require outsider support.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 9. Parent: “Learn some respect”, “Respect your elders.” Respect goes both ways and is not determined by age. If we want our children to be respectful, we must be respectful towards them. Children learn respect when parents model respect for others, including their children. 10. Parent: “I thought you were a big girl/boy”, “Stop acting like a baby”. When we link behaviour to maturity or age it instils shame in our children. Our children might be capable of a task but sometimes they might regress as a way of seeking our affection and love. Children can sometimes fear if they are more grown up, we might not love them as much or the same way. It is important as parents that we instill that our children are always worthy of love -- no matter their behaviour, age, stage of development and feelings. It is also important to remember that sometimes we all have difficult days or moments and tasks that are usually simple sometimes require more focus than usual, or they may even require outsider support.

Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 11. Parent: “Why are you always so difficult? They do this to get a reaction from me.” Our nervous systems talk to one another. A childs nervous system recognises when their parents' nervous system is dysregulated. They are acutely aware as they look to you for safety and regulation. If you are feeling dysregulated -- it is likely your child is too. We must learn to co-regulate with our children when they are feeling heightened. Often children are attempting to identify where the boundaries and limits lie. Children require boundaries and limits to feel safe, secure and held, they are necessary, they thrive on having them even when they challenge and test them.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 11. Parent: “Why are you always so difficult? They do this to get a reaction from me.” Our nervous systems talk to one another. A childs nervous system recognises when their parents' nervous system is dysregulated. They are acutely aware as they look to you for safety and regulation. If you are feeling dysregulated -- it is likely your child is too. We must learn to co-regulate with our children when they are feeling heightened. Often children are attempting to identify where the boundaries and limits lie. Children require boundaries and limits to feel safe, secure and held, they are necessary, they thrive on having them even when they challenge and test them.

Reframe, cbt, conscious parenting, parenting scripts, parenting support, gentle parenting, parenting 101, free parenting resources, Downloadable therapist memes focusing on 12 Parenting Reframes and Reminders for Trying Times By Rebecca J Young from Shed&Grow Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy. Meme reads: 12. Parent: “You need to eat just one more bite.” Model healthy eating with your children. Could you sit down and eat with them for meals? Encourage your children to identify their feelings. Guide them to understand and listen to their bodies. Show your children that you can trust their ability to feel, connect with themselves and notice when they are full, hungry or haven't had enough to eat.
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young, reads: 12. Parent: “You need to eat just one more bite.” Model healthy eating with your children. Could you sit down and eat with them for meals? Encourage your children to identify their feelings. Guide them to understand and listen to their bodies. Show your children that you can trust their ability to feel, connect with themselves and notice when they are full, hungry or haven't had enough to eat.

shed and grow hypnotherapy and psychotherapy, logo, business logo, rebirth, therapist, hypnotherapist, psychotherapist, psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, central coast, long jetty, rebecca young, rebecca jayne young, naturalistic hypnosis, cbt, nlp, talk based therapy, counselling, growth mindset, coach, motivation, change behaviour
Downloadable Meme by Rebecca J Young reads: "Did you like this? Was it helpful? Why not share the love?". Website link: shedandgrow.com.au
- Rebecca Young
shed and grow hypnotherapy and psychotherapy, logo, business logo, rebirth, therapist, hypnotherapist, psychotherapist, psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, central coast, long jetty, rebecca young, rebecca jayne young, naturalistic hypnosis, cbt, nlp, talk based therapy, counselling, growth mindset, coach, motivation, change behaviour, psychology, psychology student
Portrait photograph of Rebecca Young - Psychotherapist (Owner and operator of Shed & Grow).
Psychotherapist

CERT. Psychology. BA PsychologIical Science (Student -- 2022-CURRENT). ADV DIP Clinical Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy, CBT & NLP. DIP Clinical Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy, CBT & NLP. ACA & PACFA (Acc). DIP Children's Services. Visual Artist, Box Enthusiast, Beach Lover, Book & Craft Nerd, & Mother of 2 Humans & 1 Collie.

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shed and grow hypnotherapy and psychotherapy, logo, business logo, rebirth, therapist, hypnotherapist, psychotherapist, psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, central coast, long jetty, rebecca young, rebecca jayne young, naturalistic hypnosis, cbt, nlp, talk based therapy, counselling, growth mindset, coach, motivation, change behaviour
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I am Rebecca (she/her). I am the owner and psychotherapist at Shed & Grow. I acknowledge Guringai and Darkinjung Nations as Traditional Owners and Custodians of Country where I reside and work. I also acknowledge Aboriginal peoples as the sovereign owners of the lands of this continent in its entirety, now known as Australia. Traditional Custodians of the land have not entered any treaties, and sovereignty has never been ceded.
I pay my respects to elders past and present and sincerely apologise with deep regret for the historical and present wrongdoing and those whose lives connect me to harm. I am committed to continuous learning and unlearning to understand my role in holistically healing and repairing for the betterment of all our futures, with First Nation peoples of so-called Australia and their voices front of mind. I wholeheartedly believe that even without the historical colonial context as an Immigrant to Australia, Immigrants such as myself are a group of people who directly benefit from systems that continue to oppress all First Nations peoples of so-called Australia; I earnestly acknowledge that (Alfred Pek - Venezuelan Immigrant, SBS, 2018). Stepping forward, I aim to be accountable, grow, and do better than the generations preceding us. In that vein, I am a White-settler and Jamaican Immigrant. I was born and raised in so-called Australia; however, I am a descendant of White-settlers, Jamaican and Indigenous Migrants (from other lands) who have been displaced or moved due to the interrelated systems and impacts of colonialism, capitalism and white supremacy (Tuck & Yang, 2012). I understand the importance of stepping back to listen to First Nations peoples voices and taking a stand as an ally alongside Indigenous peoples for truth-telling, inclusion, equality, treaty and justice.

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